What’s the key to being a good human?
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What's the key to being a good human? illustration

What’s the key to being a good human?

Easier said than done. We’re all dicks to someone. But Monsters reckon ‘Don’t be a dick’ is as good a mantra as any in this crazy world, no matter who we are.

In a world becoming increasingly more divided as each day passes, rife with unhelpful labels that seem to just highlight differences and divide us, it seems pertinent to go back to basics. It’s actually quite scary to witness, it feels like we’re all feeling it at the moment. That we, as a species, are on the brink of something. There’s a lot of fear, anger and difference of opinion out there, but this brink we find ourselves on has the potential for good. For righting wrongs, learning from the past, undoing the ingrained shit that has no place in our present or future. It feels like widespread equality versus division.

Change, no matter how essential, how well intentioned, is uncomfortable for all involved. It brings out the best and worst in us. No matter what we fight for, it can be easy to get lost in it, forget our human compassion, meaning the good message can get lost. Lost in hate, misunderstanding, confusion and pain.

When we strip away the labels we created for ourselves we come back to the basic fact that we’re all human. All essentially the same, yet uniquely individual too. And as individual’s we are accountable for ourselves. We have a choice as to what we say, how we say it, how we treat others and ultimately what we think, believe and put out there in the world.

In an ideal world we’d all choose to have an open mind and to educate that mind, through a variety of perspectives. To practice acceptance, patience, compassion, empathy, respect and love. For self and others. Neither of which is always easy.

We all have the capacity to be dicks. How we go about living, fighting our fight and interacting with the world is on us. The art of being a human is imperfect, by taking care of our end we can perhaps play a positive role in changing our lives and the world for the better.

Basically - don’t be a dick (as much a possible)

You’d think that would be the right and proper way to end this article. However, for some reason I feel the need to keep typing away and will probably say far more than is necessary.

When considering this Monster mantra of ‘don’t be a dick’ I find myself examining my own life, how and when I’ve been a dick to others and how others have been dicks to me. Where that side of us comes from. There are times in life when I’ve been a dick, could have handled things better, even fallen short of the high standards I set myself. It’s inevitable I guess. I hold myself more accountable than anyone else ever will.

In general our dick-ish side seems to come out as part of our survival instincts, when we’re pushed to our limits, a subconscious action or reaction, which isn’t always relevant to the present moment in time. Sometimes it’s valid and others it’s not. Peer pressure, trauma, pain, hurt, fear, anger, insecurity, hate, discrimination, the past…along with many positive attributes these experiences can teach us, all these things test us and have the potential to fuel a side of us that make us less tolerant, less accepting, less compassionate – in the present moment.

When hurt or angry, we certainly feel entitled to feel that way, and managing those emotions, choosing how to respond to them is not easy and can bring out the worst in us. But, most of us are decent, good human beings at heart. As with most things, our level of dick-ness is a scale, of which our capacity for is often rooted in and affected by our life experiences, our subconscious, as well as our DNA.

Regardless of our environment, what has happened to us, the pain we feel inside. There comes a point when we kinda accept there’s no excuse to be a dick. No reason to project or take things personally. To let go, see the bigger picture, to be accountable for ourselves regardless of what’s around us and what others do, so that we might be able communicate and behave in a way that best serves everyone. Avoiding losing our shit, saying something out of hurt or anger, not respecting the person or persons opposite us.

Most of us are trying to be our best selves and not be dicks to each other, but the world is a fucked up place. The struggle is real. Hurt, hate, anger…it’s everywhere and it changes people, makes us forget ourselves, lose control, do crazy shit we wouldn’t normally do. There’s a lot as a species we need to challenge in the world, we all have to figure out what we stand for and how best to fight that fight. On a grander scale and closer to home.

As humans we just can’t help ourselves apparently, it’s in our DNA, our evolution from our tribal days. A constant often unseen struggle within us all to some degree. Seeing each other as equals shouldn’t be so hard, trying to understand how to make a positive impact I always end up back at self. Who I choose to be, what my values are. ‘Calling shit out’ for myself and for others based on my own principles with respect. Showing respect (not being a dick) is absolutely necessary to break down barriers.

So whilst it ain’t gonna change the world, on a very basic level The Monsters are on point, we should always be mindful of ourselves and aim not to be dicks to each other, or ourselves for that matter. Being less of a dick to ourselves is arguably where we should start…

…whoa, really? Could the answer to equality really be as simple as ‘by respecting ourselves more, means we can respect others more?’. Surly not, weeeell sometimes the simplest of ideas…

Have a great day everyone.

PS don’t be a dick – that’s all you really need to remember.

PPS my writing won’t always be this full of shit.

PPPS there are no guarantees in life.

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